How to be a daughter AND an adult (DAY 07/10)
Photo of Solange and Beyonce at Coachella 2014: Getty Images / Photo of bokeh lights by Yu Wei Lin / Edit by me
07
LOVE YOUR SIBLINGS
(Disclaimer: If you are an only child, this is not meant to snub you. I am writing from personal experience -as the oldest, with three uniquely brilliant brothers- and found the evolution with my siblings to be impactful enough to list here. Hopefully there are parallels you can apply to your experience.)
The sibling relationship is so complex. They go from being the target of our
- greenest jealousy ("You read her three stories!")
- adamant rejection ("NO BOYS ALLOWED" forts)
- tunnel-vision competition
to -hopefully- our fiercest champions.
When we finally emerge from the often tumultuous arena of "Teenager" -reaching our 20's, 30's, and beyond as independent, smart, sparkly snowflakes- we realize our growth now enables us to reach certain mature fruits.
To be honest, these fruits don't always strike us as sweet. Our siblings have known us longer than 99% of our friends, and with that, they know our closest held secrets; they know what we look like without a shred of makeup; they know what our hair looks like without a blowdryer or ounce of product; they cannot be charmed, fooled, or shmoozed; they are skeptical; they are brutally honest; they've seen us ugly-cry...many times!
But it is precisely because of all those gnarly reasons that our sister/brotherhood should be cherished.
I'm going to take a stand here and say that we shouldn't strive to surround ourselves with only those who see our manicured, proof-read, contoured, Photoshopped, exfoliated, unquestioned selves. The ones who see our broken bits, our flaws, and our true faces are often the first to offer their time, energy, and emotional capacity.
Siblings keep us REAL.
